Hometown: The Roch, MI (aka. The Crotch, aka. Crotchscratcher, aka. Crotchmolester, aka. Rochester)
Currently Living: Clawson, MI
Height: 5'8
Weight: Ha ha, yeah right
Favorite Color: Blue (preferably navy)
Profession: Researcher
Favorite Nickname: Trick, Sloan
Favorite Drinks:Vodka Tonic, Guinness, Diet Dr. Pepper, Dirty Martinis, red wine
Favorite TV Show: Friends, Sex & The City, Project Runway, The Amazing Race, Iron Chef America
Least Favorite TV Show: A Baby Story, I Love Lucy, Martha Stewart, Everybody Loves Raymond, every hour long drama
Favorite Books: The History of Love, Beloved, A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, Fight Club, A Prayer for Owen Meany, The of Being, SurUnbearable Lightness vivor, Empire Falls, The Corrections, The Bell Jar
Favorite Movies: Little Miss Sunshine, Anchorman, The 40 Year Old Virgin, Wordplay, American Beauty, Life is Beautiful, Amelie, Breakfast Club, Singin In The Rain, Sixteen Candles, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Sleeping Beauty, Dancer in the Dark, Duets, The Virgin Suicides, The Manchurian Candidate (1962), Austin Powers I, II & III, My Best Friends Wedding, Moulin Rouge, Tommy Boy, Billy Madison, The Shining, Gone With The Wind, Bridget Jones' Diary, Chicago, Love Actually
Guilty Pleasure Movies: Xanadu, Dirty Dancing, Overboard, Groundhog Day, Steel Magnolias, 10 Things I Hate About You, Bond movies, Footloose, Clue, Murder By Death, High Spirits, A Cinderella Story
What I Do Too Much: Check email, crossword puzzles, complain about my job to friends and family,
Obsessions: sushi, Indian food, ranch dressing, toenail polish, song lyrics, hands, awards shows, symmetry, avocados, maps, dreams, This American Life, the display in my car that tracks my MPG
Pet Peeves: loud eaters, slurping, gulping, arrogance, snoring, bad grammar, repetition, late mergers, ripping cardboard, the word "chunky", intolerance, couples in a restaurant sitting on the same side of a booth, pop-up ads, privacy manager, men that drive without shirts on, being foolish, unfairly jumping to conclusions, being made fun of, cat-calling, people who type too hard
Greatest Fear: crossing bridges
Relaxing Activites: late night drives to sing by myself, headstands, hot baths,
Wish I Was: Ansel Adams, Jenifer Aniston, in love, living alone
Prized Possessions: ring from my grandparents, flower pot of my Grandma's, electric blanket (temporarily broken), tongue scraper, my bed
Craziest Thing Ever Done: getting a tattoo, strip Jenga
Things I Eventually Want To Do: skydive, buy a guitar, learn how to play the aforementioned guitar, take flying lessons, travel to France, write a novel, learn how to play the harp, tap dancing lessons, run a marathon
Thursday, June 08, 2006 I don't mind, the thing that bothers me is someone keeps moving my chair....Ladies and gentlemen. Something has finally come to the suburban metropolis of Detroit that we've been starving for. That we've been deprived of. That we've driven hundreds and hundreds of miles to get.
Oh yes,
The new IKEA store opened yesterday.
Now, we can all become clones of each other and have more uniform home furnishings that the rest of the country has been privvy to for years. Now, I too can have Hensvik bookcase like my neighbor (but it's actually kind of fugly). Or I can get the Hej candleholders that everyone and their mother has. Or if I'm in the market for a bed frame, a Kongsvik should do. Now, I too can have the finest of Swedish craftsmanship just a short drive away.
I'm tickled pink with delight at the thought.
And apparently, so are a bunch of dillholes who live in this area. Can I just tell you, that the opening of the IKEA store has gotten more local news coverage than any other news story for WEEKS (even moreso than the Pistons losing). There was a 2 mile backup yesterday morning on the highway where the IKEA store is, just from GAWKERS. But perhaps people weren't gawking at the blinding blue and yellow store facade, but the fleet of police on hand, the helicopters overhead, or the hundreds of people waiting outside the store for it to open.
People started lining up to get in on Sunday night. Mind you the store didn't open until Wednesday morning. But OH WAIT!! If you're one of the first 100 people in line, YOU GET A FREE CHAIR!! Holy fuck! A CHAIR, YOU SAY!! I WILL GIVE UP THREE DAYS OF MY LIFE TO WAIT IN LINE FOR A CHAIR!! That's how crazy these people are. Do you have a job? Children? People were even SELLING their spots in line for $100. THE CHAIR COSTS $79 PEOPLE!!
To capture it quite nicely, when they were talking about the store opening yesterday on the news and the variety and abundance of furniture selection available for those shoppers at IKEA, the Channel 7 newscaster actually said the words, "I hope they can find a life there too." Amen, Frank. Amen.
I wonder how soon I can get there.....
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So even though I'm even more busy than I was just a few short weeks ago, I'm doing my very best to keep my mental state more stable than it was before. But my schedule is very comical lately. I'm at my main job half the week and then I split the other half of the week between my second job and my internship. But that's when I don't come home from work every night just to do more work. Even writing this blog is sucking a significant amount of time away from what I actually should be working on. Ahhh yes, I'm just laughing and laughing and laughing at it all.
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Other notable haps of the past few weeks:
~ Swimming in a lake. Like actual swimming not just paddling around. ~ Chilling in a hottub. ~ Going to a Polish festival (NOTE: fair/carnival rides have come a long way since I was young. But I'm still pretty certain that I would vomit on the Zipper. Again,). ~ Frolicked on the swings (they still make me motion sick). ~ Multiple backyard BBQs. 3 to be exact. ~ Had my feet mulched by mutant mostquitos during said BBQs. ~ Drank way to much wine twice during two of said BBQs (apologies owed to Pnut for, what I recall to be, a rather drunken phone conversation, and the boy, for passing out sans nookie). ~ OUR ROSE BUSHES ARE BLOOMING!! I'm back to being the maniac that comes skipping out of her car when she gets home from work to smell the roses. ~ The heartbreak of the Pistons being eliminated by the Heat. If I ever pass Shaq on the street, he better look out, cos I just might kick his ass.
Alright. That's it. I can't think of anything else. Here's another empty promise: I'll write more.
Until then, I'll leave you to gaze fondly upon this:
